Writing Assignment Three
Dan Feuerbach
English 354
3-31-06
Writing Assignment Three
Every time you’ve ever gone to the grocery store you’ve seen it. Odds are you passed over it, not even to bothering to give a second thought. Other times you may have read an amusing headline and bought eggs. Perhaps once you bought it just for laughs then let it slide to the back of your mind. Regardless, it’s always been there, the black and white tabloid that is The Weekly World News.
The newspaper consists of bad puns and even worse photo-shop jobs. Each week the writers and editors take two pictures and slam them together to form obviously faked images while on the inside old clichés and proverbs are twisted to give a pun that would make even the snootiest individuals groan.
This tabloid-style magazine is distributed across the nation, mostly at grocery stores. It is satire and comedy rolled into one. It is printed in black in white to give it a certain “old-school charm” that makes it seem more believable. Proudly bearing the phrase “The world’s only reliable newspaper” beneath its title a glance through this paper can provide laughs and knowledge.
On the particular issue I purchased the banner proclaims “G.O.P. To Resurrect Reagan For ’08!” To the right of this decree was a photo of the late-president with his face edited to look decayed. Upon looking at the actual article the writer, Scott Stevens, adds the phrase ‘You can’t keep a good man down.’ The roughly two-hundred word article doesn’t say anything new that the headlines didn’t already say but the legitimate newspaper-style format makes the funnier because a ridiculous idea is tried to be passed off as a real story.
Flipping through the pages reveals a theme. Angels, demons, space, relationships with weird twists, ghosts and UFOs pop up on the pages. One gets a feeling of a magazine aimed at catering to the demands of the lower-class. The magazine seems to be aimed at pacifying the fears people have of the after-life and ghosts. In the horoscope one in every three signs promises some kind of rapidly-approaching financial or relationship fortune.
This image of exploiting the not-so-bright is best seen in the paper’s advertisements. The majority is hotlines for psychics, tarot readings and casting spells. These ads promise lovers to returns, problems to be solved and obstacles to be cleared. The next largest section is the financial/loans section. These promise either free money or debt solutions. The smallest section is the education ad and it promises an easy way to earn a high school diploma from home.
The world portrayed in the magazine is filled with fantasy and whimsy. Obviously these stories are just that: stories, but the magazine still fills its pages with “Leper-chauns” (the leprechauns of Ireland being devastated by a plague) and the ancient Egyptian “Oedipus Complex” which was the world’s first psychiatric hospital.
There is a warning label on the inside that says the stories are all for fun, but it is small and difficult to find. I purchased three different issues before I noticed it. The fact that a warning label needs to be included at all suggests that at some point people took this magazine seriously, which implies that some people presently take it seriously.
One theory about The Weekly World News is it lulls readers into a false sense of security about the world. Anybody who would believe the magazine could be easily duped. When these less-than-Harvard-graduate individuals get these false notions about life, they may seek guidance with the magazine and as a result use the ads to make their life like the publication tells them.
Women’s roles in the issue are also very simple. Most of the stories are about men and how they react to or instigate situations. However the most publicized female feature in the magazine is the “Page Five Honey.” On the fifth page will be a single, black-and-white photo of a scantily clad woman with a brief caption about her past modeling work. The inside photo is advertised on the back with a similar picture.
However on the inside is a woman named “Dolly” who runs the advice column. She emphasizes taking personal responsibility for actions/wrong doings and taking a stand when people try to push you around. However her section is right before “Horse Sense” and “Monkey Business” in which a horse and a chimp talk about health and financial matters, respectively. It becomes difficult to take advice about personal responsibility when the next page has a horse telling you not to eat meat.
Men are portrayed as getting in adventures and kicking asses. Matt Daemon, the paper’s seeker of obscure supernatural phenomena (i.e.: Iguana Girl and The Tree People) goes around the world fighting monsters, demons, ghosts werewolves and vampires. Usually his calls come from shrieking women afraid to do anything about it. So he comes to the rescue. When he is finished they will throw themselves at him but he will rejects the advances and move onto his next adventure.
I have been keeping an eye on the magazine for about three months now, buying it one or two times a month at various locations. I have only found it at grocery stores. I have yet to see one for sale in a different location. It is found with celebrity-themed tabloids and costs around three dollars. Based on the target demographics of tabloids it is safe to assume the majority audience is housewives.
The magazine is very hit-or-miss to me. Some weeks the puns will be amazing and I will be entertained for hours by the articles like “Man’s Feet Arrested for Attempted Murder after Owner Says: ‘My Feet are Killing Me.’” Other times It will be just a rehash of UFO or Bigfoot-related articles that are predictable and bland.
One thing that must be noted is the liberal-bias that permeates through to this paper. Occasionally an article will appear about President Bush that paints a picture of him as a slow, dim-witted moron. A weekly comic entitled “Spy Cat” does the same thing.
In one issue an article “Bush Creates Department of Paranormal” the President creates an entire new intelligence agency because he thinks his room is haunted by ghosts. He uses billions of tax payer dollars to fund this ridiculous undertaking.
In “Spy Cat” the hero, a cat who covertly sneaks around the battlefields of Iraq saving U.S. soldiers from harm. Spy Cat will routinely be issued medals from Bush who will never quite remember who he’s giving the medal to or why he’s giving it. After receiving a medal from Bush in one issue Spy Cat asks why Bush didn’t go to Vietnam and Bush blushes and runs away.
In conclusion, The Weekly World News is a source of entertainment that may often be taken the wrong way. The bad puns and photo-shop jobs are all fun and games but occasionally people will get hurt. People who take it too seriously may be tempted to spend hard earned money on quick-fixes to larger problems. The magazine is definitely a major player in the tabloid game that should be check out to everyone at least once.
English 354
3-31-06
Writing Assignment Three
Every time you’ve ever gone to the grocery store you’ve seen it. Odds are you passed over it, not even to bothering to give a second thought. Other times you may have read an amusing headline and bought eggs. Perhaps once you bought it just for laughs then let it slide to the back of your mind. Regardless, it’s always been there, the black and white tabloid that is The Weekly World News.
The newspaper consists of bad puns and even worse photo-shop jobs. Each week the writers and editors take two pictures and slam them together to form obviously faked images while on the inside old clichés and proverbs are twisted to give a pun that would make even the snootiest individuals groan.
This tabloid-style magazine is distributed across the nation, mostly at grocery stores. It is satire and comedy rolled into one. It is printed in black in white to give it a certain “old-school charm” that makes it seem more believable. Proudly bearing the phrase “The world’s only reliable newspaper” beneath its title a glance through this paper can provide laughs and knowledge.
On the particular issue I purchased the banner proclaims “G.O.P. To Resurrect Reagan For ’08!” To the right of this decree was a photo of the late-president with his face edited to look decayed. Upon looking at the actual article the writer, Scott Stevens, adds the phrase ‘You can’t keep a good man down.’ The roughly two-hundred word article doesn’t say anything new that the headlines didn’t already say but the legitimate newspaper-style format makes the funnier because a ridiculous idea is tried to be passed off as a real story.
Flipping through the pages reveals a theme. Angels, demons, space, relationships with weird twists, ghosts and UFOs pop up on the pages. One gets a feeling of a magazine aimed at catering to the demands of the lower-class. The magazine seems to be aimed at pacifying the fears people have of the after-life and ghosts. In the horoscope one in every three signs promises some kind of rapidly-approaching financial or relationship fortune.
This image of exploiting the not-so-bright is best seen in the paper’s advertisements. The majority is hotlines for psychics, tarot readings and casting spells. These ads promise lovers to returns, problems to be solved and obstacles to be cleared. The next largest section is the financial/loans section. These promise either free money or debt solutions. The smallest section is the education ad and it promises an easy way to earn a high school diploma from home.
The world portrayed in the magazine is filled with fantasy and whimsy. Obviously these stories are just that: stories, but the magazine still fills its pages with “Leper-chauns” (the leprechauns of Ireland being devastated by a plague) and the ancient Egyptian “Oedipus Complex” which was the world’s first psychiatric hospital.
There is a warning label on the inside that says the stories are all for fun, but it is small and difficult to find. I purchased three different issues before I noticed it. The fact that a warning label needs to be included at all suggests that at some point people took this magazine seriously, which implies that some people presently take it seriously.
One theory about The Weekly World News is it lulls readers into a false sense of security about the world. Anybody who would believe the magazine could be easily duped. When these less-than-Harvard-graduate individuals get these false notions about life, they may seek guidance with the magazine and as a result use the ads to make their life like the publication tells them.
Women’s roles in the issue are also very simple. Most of the stories are about men and how they react to or instigate situations. However the most publicized female feature in the magazine is the “Page Five Honey.” On the fifth page will be a single, black-and-white photo of a scantily clad woman with a brief caption about her past modeling work. The inside photo is advertised on the back with a similar picture.
However on the inside is a woman named “Dolly” who runs the advice column. She emphasizes taking personal responsibility for actions/wrong doings and taking a stand when people try to push you around. However her section is right before “Horse Sense” and “Monkey Business” in which a horse and a chimp talk about health and financial matters, respectively. It becomes difficult to take advice about personal responsibility when the next page has a horse telling you not to eat meat.
Men are portrayed as getting in adventures and kicking asses. Matt Daemon, the paper’s seeker of obscure supernatural phenomena (i.e.: Iguana Girl and The Tree People) goes around the world fighting monsters, demons, ghosts werewolves and vampires. Usually his calls come from shrieking women afraid to do anything about it. So he comes to the rescue. When he is finished they will throw themselves at him but he will rejects the advances and move onto his next adventure.
I have been keeping an eye on the magazine for about three months now, buying it one or two times a month at various locations. I have only found it at grocery stores. I have yet to see one for sale in a different location. It is found with celebrity-themed tabloids and costs around three dollars. Based on the target demographics of tabloids it is safe to assume the majority audience is housewives.
The magazine is very hit-or-miss to me. Some weeks the puns will be amazing and I will be entertained for hours by the articles like “Man’s Feet Arrested for Attempted Murder after Owner Says: ‘My Feet are Killing Me.’” Other times It will be just a rehash of UFO or Bigfoot-related articles that are predictable and bland.
One thing that must be noted is the liberal-bias that permeates through to this paper. Occasionally an article will appear about President Bush that paints a picture of him as a slow, dim-witted moron. A weekly comic entitled “Spy Cat” does the same thing.
In one issue an article “Bush Creates Department of Paranormal” the President creates an entire new intelligence agency because he thinks his room is haunted by ghosts. He uses billions of tax payer dollars to fund this ridiculous undertaking.
In “Spy Cat” the hero, a cat who covertly sneaks around the battlefields of Iraq saving U.S. soldiers from harm. Spy Cat will routinely be issued medals from Bush who will never quite remember who he’s giving the medal to or why he’s giving it. After receiving a medal from Bush in one issue Spy Cat asks why Bush didn’t go to Vietnam and Bush blushes and runs away.
In conclusion, The Weekly World News is a source of entertainment that may often be taken the wrong way. The bad puns and photo-shop jobs are all fun and games but occasionally people will get hurt. People who take it too seriously may be tempted to spend hard earned money on quick-fixes to larger problems. The magazine is definitely a major player in the tabloid game that should be check out to everyone at least once.
posted by Dan at 12:56 AM
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